Terrible news, everyone: Professional doof McCree, a fake cowboy who can’t even quote a more famous fake cowboy correctly, got hot. The Overwatch community is struggling with this sudden and confusing development.
Image credit: Blizzard.
Yesterday, Blizzard updated Overwatch with a new Summer Games event that includes a bunch of themed skins, among them a lifeguard skin for McCree that represents everything both great and terrible about his character:
Great: Abs. Terrible: Poorly dyed Owen Wilson hair, popsicle stick in mouth, “SAMF” belt, “High Tide” lanyard, and so on. Of course a middle-aged man who cosplays as a cowboy on the daily would even manage to doof up his hottest look. Of course he would.
And yet, one could make an argument that he even upstages Widowmaker, an ice-cold queen who only accepts tribute in the form of fan thirst, here:
For myself and others, it’s a conundrum. Is McCree sexy now? Is that even possible? And what does that say about all of us? If we accept that we’re collectively attracted to McCree, even if only on a physical basis, who do we become? Fan opinions are divided:
https://twitter.com/oodlenoodle_/status/894965839321083904
blizzard: horny widowmaker fans have we got a treat for you
blizz: well, mccree fans, unfortunately we just ruined everything good abotu him— tracey 🌱 (@rokudo) August 8, 2017
Me: the mcsrooge skin is the worst mccree skin
Blizz: u are little baby, watch thi— tanya 》hotwheels sisyphus 2024 (@tanyart) August 8, 2017
https://twitter.com/spacegay1993/status/894966118984675328
https://twitter.com/Axelsaywhat/status/895415648347602944
feel like every time McCree gets an update it’s jeph saying “ok u fools , try to jack off to This” & response is always “challenge accepted”
— STARMAP (@vageege) August 8, 2017
https://twitter.com/mccree_txt/status/894972640628277248
http://chuckpup.tumblr.com/post/163957590480/i-fixed-him
https://draevian.tumblr.com/post/163963988020/you-can-see-mccrees-roots-starting-to-show
And from a Reddit thread titled “Here’s what McCree’s skin should have been”:
Bonus: Nobody can figure out what “SAMF” stands for:
yeah there’s a lot of weird unanswered things in overwatch… but what I wanna know is…
WHAT DOES SAMF MEAN!!!!! pic.twitter.com/sBpJGWftO6— Mabel Syrup 🥞🦈🖤 (@thepancakewitch) August 9, 2017
pls tell me mccree’s SAMF belt buckle means “SALTY ASS MOTHER FUCKER”
— high blood pleasure (@hinokit) August 8, 2017
SAMF
Sunburnt Ass Motherfcker— 🌿Watt 🔜 C2E2 🔜 Fanime (@onemegawatt) August 8, 2017
SAMF = Sad Ass Mother Fucker
McCree has depression at the beach confirmed pic.twitter.com/tA6YO8N6ia— ✨Di✨ Comms CLOSED (@GhostAlebrije) August 8, 2017
https://twitter.com/editraynor/status/895032182628134912
me: samf stands for stupid ass motherfcuker
mccree, crying: it’s sad you bitch— Hanzo✨ (@dragons_txt) August 8, 2017
confirmed:
Sandeating-[lookin]-Ass MotherFucker
or
Sad Ass MotherFucker pic.twitter.com/v7HNaE3Iuw
— Tim (@unimplied) August 8, 2017
In my opinion, though, it’s all really quite simple:
SAMF
Sexy
Abs
still don’t Make
me want to Fuck mccree pic.twitter.com/UhZsct4FSm— Nathan Grayson (@Vahn16) August 8, 2017
Comments
8 responses to “Overwatch Fans Can’t Decide If McCree Is Hot Or Not”
He was always hot, you savages.
Yeah like, who the hell were we comparing him to? He’s already on the level.
Why no belly button? Why? *Waves arms*
He’s a clone specifically created to act in cowboy movies but was re-purposed at the beginning of the Omnic Wars
Sandy Ass Mother Fucker.
Top quality journalism.
SAMF = Safe As Mother Fucker
Because he’s a Lifesaver/Life GuardCongratulations on getting paid to write this.